Category Archives: sleep paralysis

If I Should Die Before I awake….

The spring of 1986 that I first began to experience a series of waking up, unable to move.

Being off for school for one full week because I was on spring/Easter break just like every student. It was on the morning of Palm Sunday before enjoying a week of playing video games at Joe’s Pizza at the Liberty Links Shopping Plaza and waiting for my old man this very morning to take me out fishing to Orwoods located in the California Delta instead of attending Sunday services, just for once.

That morning, prior to awakening, I was in deep sleep. I couldn’t remember the exact details in the dream ,except the scene took place in a dark tunnel with a girl in it and along with her reptiles and insects swarmed within.

Onset of awakening this feeling of being numb as though my blood circulation was cut off. I felt weak and very groggy. At the right peripheral view of my right eye, a blurred figure was there standing at the foot of my bed. My vision was blurred; I thought I had seen a robed figure lurking at me from a short distance. My eyes was still fluttering in a part REM sleep-awake stage. Suddenly my sight became visible able to see clearly.

And here I was pinned down on the bed unable to move. I tried to move, and could not; semi-awake, nearly choking to death as though a unseen powerful force was there strangling me nearly to death, as I made a desperate attempt to yell out for help to anyone in the house to rescue me from the phantom. The more I struggled to fight this thing off me, the heavier the weight. I gasped for air.

Soon the paralysis stopped after a short while; the grasp of a heavy choke hold from the phantom diminished after. I was able to breathe at ease. The incident was virtually haunting as if I was attacked by a supernatural entity. Such mixed emotions, fear and anxiety crept inside of me. Too, I was mad a hell in searching for an elusive stranger that may off been lurking around my bed; dashing out, I searched for The Phantom who could of been hiding under my bed; then, I searched the nearby closet: nothing or nobody was anywhere to be found.

For the first time in my life, I felt soo lonely with knowledge I was under attack, there was nobody there to come to my rescue. In my early years as teen I was in my way a tough kid, growing up being picked on by school bullies; often, either way I or they asked for a fight. Maybe this particular Palm Sunday morning it was a entity  who challenged me to a fight. Could it be God who I thought at that morning was hating me, playing a twisted sick prank on me. Whatever this unseen force derived from, this incident gave away a thought I was being subjected to mental illness the days following, barely living on the edge.

This was the first time I’ve ever experienced such dread, so different from a ordinary nightmare that I had ever had in the past. It seemed so real that the aspects speak for itself:

Unable to move/paralyzed and unable to speak

The feeling of presence/and pressure on the chest and various tactile feelings on parts of the body

The audio and visual hallucinations.


In the months and years following, a dark shadow pushing its weight on me. The sinking into the bed mattress and being suffocated with my pillow.  These are signs of HHE(Hypnagogic/Hypnopompic Hallucination Experiences) with with ISP(Isolated Sleep Paralysis) and or ASP(Awake Sleep Paralysis.



Sleep Paralysis poem.

The fifth year of the second millenium A.D.
Sleep Paralysis
Oh the old hag striketh me in the night
She comes to bring me visions of  fright
Upon my bed she clutches my throat with her almighty hands
I lay upon my bed unable to move
I desperately attempt to utter a sound
The only thing that I hear and feel is the caving in of the old hags pound
Upon my chest the old hag laughs
I manage to escape but the more the struggle
The heavier the weight I gasp for air
Oh cometh morning sky when will you cometh
The raven flies over this night
Strikeths its victim with the terror of its might
Oh cometh sunrise when will you appear
Help me to escape this state of  terror
The heavy breathing of a beast stalks upon with its eyes that stare
From the old hag appears the Mare
Now with the wiggling of my fingers to fight off this monster
Hell awaits for me near
The tormented laugh dancing around my surroundings
I still cannot  break off the paralyzing boundings
Old Hag
The Mare
Dancing around in prolonging glee
Oh morning sky set me free
Old Hag
The Mare
Dancing around me in endless glee
They bound me tighter so that I cannot break free
Oppressed Oppressed
The alienated body of demons enters down upon where I sleep
Oppressed Oppressed
The incubus and succubus craving my body giving me shrivers of creep
Dark Weeping Willow tree appear before my eyes
Upon its limbs perches the raven
Staring at me with it’s elusive eyes
Set me free
My subconscious streams
Set me free
The heaviness of my legs are weak to break free
Sleep Paralysis is my fate
The terror of sleep paralysis is my fate
Sleep Paralysis is my fate
Cometh morning sky that you will save me from this fate
Before it is too late

“The Hand” Sleep Paralysis/Lucid Dreaming.

I could see the movement of my hand rising above my view which in reality my hands during a bout of sleep paralysis is much immobilized. I am the midst of a state of lucid dreaming when I am awake knowingly I am in a dream state right before or nearly in precision timing when I am about to awake.

Several years ago I tried to do an experiment to see if I can see my physical hands while in a lucid dream and the results subsequently that followed proved it. It was three quarter past three A.M. I ha no sleep since 7 A.M. the previous day. My body was exhausted, but anyways, experimental in sleep, half-wake I played a movie on DVD. I timed myself. I feel into sleep around 4:45 A.M. when knowingly I would drift into sleep paralysis and by stating “sleep paralysis” I am not saying the “sleep paralysis awakeness”but the normal sleep paralysis which everybody goes into REM paralysis that keeps us from acting out our dreams or else we all would unintentionally harm ourselves if we did act out our dreams called sleep walking, a very rare phenomenon for some.

Before I go on further about my experiment, here is a brief explanation of what muscle atonia is.

Muscle atonia that is not muscle tone, a feeling of being “numb” resulting from something in the brains secretion that produces a drug of anesthesia to relax the muscles and keeps on emitting in the body’s nervous central system. To that affect, the muscles are first becoming relaxed; and finally paralyzed. With the exception of the diaphragm, the muscles located under the lower ribs, right in the sternum region; this large muscle contracts inhaling and exhaling with the lungs. Other muscles in our body that is not paralyzed is our eyes, as they flutter hence is why it is called rapid eye movement serves as a purpose to locate a sequence of dreams. The throat muscles are too, not paralyzed. However, the vocal chords are limited to normal paralysis.

When we find ourselves in awareness, to know that freeze, paralyzed sensation of not being able to use the muscles, muscle atonia, that is called awareness sleep paralysis, and this is momentarily and causes no harm because of two things that either occur; 1) the secretions of those released hormones are not emitted completely to wear off, this is timing that occurs within a matter of seconds to several moments. I don’t know of anyone who had a prolong state of paralysis, though it must be very eerie that more it takes to wear off that paralysis. 2) The astral body(depends on a belief system) is floating to another dimension, space, into a positive gate or negative gate an your “soul” or ‘astral body’ has not completely return from a journey. It’s like a half away in between space and back into your own self. Astral Voyage, I did read some books on astral projection and used to come to me  naturally. Experts of the paranormal say it is usually genetic; I am not certain, nobody in my bloodline had or has awareness sleep paralysis or as Sylvan Muldoon coined being out of the body, “astral catalepsy.” Sensitive people are highly susceptible to sleep paralysis.

Back to  the experiment. That morning when I had the DVD in the play mode. I could vividly see both the actors and actresses in verbal speech and what they were doing. I also could see numbers. I can concur with this what Carl Jung’s time, synchronicity. He said about numbers are significant meaning to each individuals life and that are more than just a coincidence.

This episode I am referring to on here I would say it is taken as being a lucid dream. I know that I am moving a hand around my head, though it(hand) in essence is right aside of me. I can describe it like an apparition hand waving back in forth between my sight and the television. A ghost hand if you will. You might not think it is physically possible to move around a ghost hand, it is a subliminal level of consciousness picking up pieces of information just like patients at hospitals who have said to have a near death experiment(NDE) or were in a claimed “death experience”(flat lined) recorded by medical staff where the patients described in detail seeing everybody including floating above the ceiling and entering a tunnel seeing different people including God as they could only hear His voice talking to them.

I had one myself during anesthesia at a dental surgery back then to pull out overcrowded teeth. I was not dead, but my subliminal body felt as though I must of “died” on the operating table. It was blissful as though I did not want to return. Darn. I only came back to have a pair of dental assistants and of course the dental surgeon look at me in the face; they said I was “wheezing” which is why to be reassured one of them yelled out my name; they told me I looked “stone cold” dead. Staring at the light fixture above. Most of the time when I was “floating” I could see clouds and that gore and blood they vacuumed out with a tube.

Waving back in a swinging motion with this hand technique, I knew it was a lucid dream. I could see fluttering gas clouds standing on my right peripheral view was a robed figure had been in the room acting out as an observer.  I could not move my head around to face the right side but my senses picked up whoever it was had been here. I had on this mystical dream catcher over my bedside; so it was not an nightmare or else in legendary folklore that bad dream would be caught in the web. Still, the robed figure was still there. I could of snapped, “BOO! GO AWAY!” My vocals were paralyzed even though I tried to synchronize time to break off the paralysis. I could hear a faint, “Cccome ooover hheeere” slightly escaping my lips. My eyes were wide open. The tiny whispers of this robed figure assured my I’d be fine What? A subliminal message. Say what? I think it said , “They will come to get them.Be steady fast.” Nobody is coming to get who. And if so, whom? What the heck? I could only try to record whatever it said in a faint monologue. “Get them out. You must not sleep. Keep alert.” Something to best of my recollection about “downward spiral”? Next thing I knew was a source of red light outside the bedroom window “flashing” I know this because I had slept two nights before  with the shutters half open. When I awoke there was the lights flashing, a gigantic “eye” was hovering above the skyline. The sound of a diesel idling was parked outside. This was accompanied by a loud “Humming.” I became deaf momentarily afterwards; my cranium was crammed to the point of nearly exploding. Finally, I was able to regain my hearing. Was it a UFO? Cool, a UFO. I hopped out and dashed towards the window; the lights stopped. Nobody was out there. No UFO. No gigantic big eye in the sky. No diesel. Finally, I awoke. My goodness, a false awakening.

Where the figure stood, there was a “moist” to the floor on that very spot. With a flashlight I examined for any leaks. There was not a drop of water. No evaporation. Just almost directly across the room the previous year at that time an apparition of a sort of a young one watching me as I slept.

Anybody who has awareness sleep paralysis and wants to do this “hand technique” give it a try; you might find other ways of knowing sleep paralysis and lucid dreaming is more than meets the eye. You just might stimulate a subliminal “spirit” to come to you. Just an study; analysis of what I can make out of this. Maybe those numbers at the Starbucks painting was telling me a message. If anything paranormal: An encrypted warning.

No terrorist attack, I do not want find in this subliminal message. I don’t need another 9 1 1 telepathy.


Narcolepsy facts.

You’ve seen the comedy “Deuce Bigolow” of a woman dropping like a fly and sleeps with no unexplained reason. Active one minute, the next thing you know she collapses into a sleep attack. Sure it may seem funny, but thinking twice of what an actual person inflicted with this condition is not humorous.  What you have seen is a neurological condition-narcolepsy- as you may of well heard of.

How well do any of you know anything about narcolepsy and the four classic symptoms? Probably not unless you are going through it.

1)EDS-Excessive Daytime Sleepiness 2)Cataplexy 3)Sleep Paralysis 4)HHE-Hypnogogic Hallucination Experiences.

As a person who experiences (isolated) sleep paralysis and HHE, I do know that I have a isolated case of SP and not narcolepsy. Accordingly to Dr. Jorge Conesa, six percent inflicted with ISP – isolated sleep paralysis- get SP often. In making a distinction, the sleep paralysis which I blogged is in the sleep paralysis to best describing the analogy of narcolepsy. All narcoleptics have sleep paralysis; not all people with SP are narcoleptics. Narcolepsy on the contrary, is a never ending disability via neurological disease taking on the toll about 200,000 Americans, while Stanford University reports 1 out of 2,000 individuals have it, while only 50,000 are diagnosed.

The primary symptom of narcolepsy is Excessive Daytime Sleepiness called sleep attacks, yet is generally experienced as a overwhelmingly sense of sleepiness like you have not slept in a few days, several times a day. EDS is the only symptom required for one to have narcolepsy. Narcolepsy is diagnosed by a MSLT-Multiple Sleep Latency Test, a daytime sleep test where your brainwaves are measured by an EEG during four or five naps 2 hours apart. If you go immediately into REM sleep at least 2 of the naps, you get diagnosed with narcolepsy.

Cataplexy – A part or complete muscle tone loss and paralysis, resulting in a extreme emotion such as laughter, anger — fighting off a sleep attack. Cataplexy is a major symptom of narcolepsy. Research indicated 80% – 90% have cataplexy at least once in their life.

Hypnogogic Hallucination Experiences are dream like imagery and sensations intertwined wiht the consciousness of the physical world: the five human senses. Only the HHE are accompanied with seeing shadows, aliens/greys, hearing strange noises from beeping to loud buzzing sounds.

Sleep Paralysis. This is common in all narcoleptics and people inflicted with ISP. SP occurs when the sleeper is about to go into sleep(hypnogogic) and awakening(hypnopompic). It is similar to cataplexy since there is completed loss of muscle tone, or muscle atonia. There is no permanent paralysis in atonia though the sensation of the inability to move starts from a few moments to a long period of time as in some people I have corresponded in the past who suffer from narcolepsy.

Dr. William Dement, one of the pioneers in sleep research, at Stanford University asserts there is a link between very low sodium in the genetic cells of dogs that triggers these canines to slump in cataplexy. Researchers had been testing suspected narcoleptics by taking a small amount of spinal fluid from the cerebral and then studied to determine if any deficient levels of hypocretin is present. Hypocretin is also known as orexin; it contains sodium, sugar, protein levels in your brain that needs also to function.

Furthermore if you have a member of your family  that is narcoleptic, in  a 200-fold there is a chance of you getting this condition. The average age set where narcolepsy begins is around 12 but is unusually to get it no later than 21.

When a person goes into slumber and ploops into sleep frequently this is what the rest of society stigmatizes as laziness. There are misunderstood facts on this condition and lack of public awareness needs to be addressed.


Bangungot – A Filipino sleepers demon.

“Bangungot” from the Tagalog word “to rise and moan in sleep.”

When I done research on sleep paralysis over a decade ago, I just thought to myself what I had is mainly a scientific thing; no harm into what 6% of the general population undergoes. At least one time in their life.

Sleep Paralysis Awakeness or ASP is usually something medical. A scientific theory, not actual fact, that a person goes to sleep, a neurotransmitter releases hormones called acetylcholine that are released from that small portion of the brain, called the pon, and what it does, it flows from your brain and into the receptors  that keep us essentially paralyzed-REM paralysis. This keeps us from acting out our dreams or we would unintentionally sleep walk(and yes, there is cases of sleep walking) and harm ourselves during nocturnal sleep.

Rather in cases of ASP, a person awakes during sleep cycle before the neurotransmitter wears off. The mind is awake, the body is still asleep. That is called hypnopompic sleep paralysis, accompanied by hallucinations of seeing dark shadows on the wall and that feeling of being hagged by somebody or something.

Upon further research I stumbled upon some material that would manifest into a sleepers demon in cultural folklore/myth in various parts of the world.

The hag as what is known is interpreted in various cultures.  In Newfoundland up in Canada, it is often referred as The Old Hag Syndrome.

In Arabic, it is named a djinn, or evil spirits.

Japan, the kanashibari. Laos, da cho.  Greece, the mora. Typically, it is a nightmare in the SP form such as in Spain, the pesadilla.

In the ilocano section of the Philippines, the Bangungot or the batibat.

The Bangungot is thought to be in the form of sleep paralysis, but  is a mixture of both medical and folklore. In medical aspect, the victim died of a poor diet, which is the Filipino culture, many people, roughly men consume highly fatty foods consumed with lots of pork and drink a lot of alcohol beverage and worth mentioning of a salty diet; it’s a Filipino custom. I believe what is presented is the brugada syndrome, a serious heart condition or a bad case of acute hemorrhagic pancreatitis.

In folklore, the batibat is a female demon or a spirit taking the form of a tree. The trees is cut down for the purpose of making a bed post or a house. In short, taking revenge on the men who cut down the trees; and what the demon does, it sits on the face or chest of its victim, who experiences paralysis.  He gasps for air until he dies from asphyxiation. Both cases: it is usually the male in that region of the world is the victim.

No known victim ever survived this bangungot syndrome.

And it is certainly not to be a form of sleep paralysis as those inflicted with it, do not die from ASP.  Bangungot is more a rather serious condition to that compared to sleep apnea and the dreaded SUDS – Sudden Unexplained Death Syndrome and SUNDS -Sudden Unexplained Death Syndrome.

Read on this link about the Bangungot Syndrome in Manila

Bangungot happens when sleeping in the supine position just as it happens during ASP. In Filipino cultures, the older recommend wiggling the big toes of people experiencing this to encourage their heart to snap back to a normal.  Mind you, sleep paralysis is a scientific theory and does not mean the paranormal, yet we have a great place to start. Such as in this site:

The Boogie Men of the Philippines

Philippine Urban Legend: Bangungot, real? or myth?

Legend from Irregular Times.

And this one on both folklore and science




The Mystery of Hypnagogic-Hypnopompic Hallucinations

The phenomena of both descriptions of ‘psycho sensory hallucinations’ ,was first described by French psychiatrist Bailarger in 1846.

It was a systematic description of vivid perceptions of hallucinations onset of falling asleep,and upon awakening.

“Hypnagogic (or a alternate term-hypnogogic) from the term ‘hypno'(asleep) and ‘agogos’ (induced) was coined by French scholar Louis Ferdinand Alfred Maury in the same year,in term of describing some unusual illusions upon of asleep.
“Hynopompic” derives from the greek word ‘pompe'(act of sending) “coined” by British spiritualist & philosopher Myer to describe  hallucinations in the transition between sleep and awakening.
Both terms are often associated by health care professionals as symptoms categorized as “narcolepsy”(sleep attacks usually anytime during the day from a low level of hypocretin in the brain).  According to one source it is very common with individuals with mental disorders.  I do not buy that, nor am I narcoleptic (and was never diagnosed with this neurological disorder).  Narcolepsy has four classic symptoms:
Excessive Daytime Sleepiness
Hypnagogic/Hypnopompic Experiences
Sleep Paralysis
All Narcoleptics in common have these four classic symptoms, as all narcoleptics have sleep paralysis and do have sleep attacks. Not everyone who has undergone awake sleep paralysis is a narcoleptic.
Around some 20 years ago, and once in a great while, I did feel some weakness of the limbs, and a slight jerk of the head and FOP (feeling of presence) as some outlined shape illusion tackled me on top of my bed, as I was resembled like that bizarre creature from the movie ‘Predator’ where it blending in the surrounding environment, except it is usually in  fuzzy/murky color,and semi-shaped.
It is strange how powerful how our brain activates ,even during the sleep process.  If this was to mean ,that heaviness crushing upon people with sleep paralysis,including of a visit from a ‘alien’ .  Seems more intense than vivid.
Sleep Paralysis in either predormital or postdormital form is regarded as being found in “creative”,”artistic”,and “sensitive” individuals.  I can relate more to the latter.